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Forgiveness: The Primary Currency of Relationships

We live in a culture where apologizing is done when we have been caught doing something wrong. The general idea is that we live our life well, not needing to seek forgiveness or say, “I’m sorry”, except on rare occasions where we don’t have other options.

Forgiveness is rarely used. Defensiveness and posturing are seen as acceptable alternatives to forgiveness. Judgement and accountability are often used as cover for power and control in relationships.

Jesus communicates something completely different about forgiveness. It is the primary currency of relationships. It is meant to be moving back and forth freely in our interactions. It is designed to be given and received often.

The reality is that you and I fall and stumble in many ways all the time. It is freeing to let forgiveness flow every day, in real time situations. One time, Jesus was asked how many times a person should forgive another person, even for the same offense. Jesus response was, “unlimited.”

What I hear Jesus saying is that we are to bring forgiveness to every situation and every relationship all the time. This is where the rub often occurs. Questions like, “How can I ever forgive them for what they have done?” become a real challenge.

What is the alternative to forgiveness? Is it anger, being defined by hurt, pain or a hard spirit? The alternatives of not forgiving turn into real burdens in our lives.

We are not the source of forgiveness. God is. He is unlimited in giving forgiveness. He will also give us the capacity to give and receive forgiveness in every relationship for every situation.

The benefits of forgiveness are real. Through forgiving people we tend to enjoy a greater awareness of the needs of others and experience God’s peace in our lives. We are able to recognize that all of us need grace in our lives. When we forgive, we are not consumed with bitterness, but rather, experience contentment in our lives.

Let forgiveness become the primary currency that is exchanged in your relationships and experience the life and health that comes from it.

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Don’t Throw Away What Really Matters

“So don’t throw away this confident trust in the Lord.” The Apostle Paul, Hebrews 10:35

“I’ve had it!” “I am so done!” “I’m out of here!” Most of us have thought or spoken these words of exasperation, hurt, frustration, exhaustion or fear. Sometimes we go a step further and tell God that it is all His fault and we are done with Him, too.

The Apostle Paul jumps into the middle of this reality in the book of Hebrews. Paul reminds us about the awesome sacrifice of Jesus Christ for all that is wrong and evil. He encourages us to work together to lift each other up and to do good in the world. He helps us remember very difficult suffering. Specifically, he references a time when people were being put into jail and stripped of all their personal belongings. It was a hard time.

Paul goes on to remind us that our trust in the Lord has carried us through past difficulties and He will carry us now. His words are for us today. Don’t throw away what really matters. At the top of the list of what really matters is our trust in God. Trusting God is meant to be part of our everyday living. Trusting God connects all of life together and gives us unusual capacity to walk through the most challenging of times. Trusting God reminds us of who has done the “heavy lifting” on our behalf – Jesus Christ. Trusting God reminds us that He is doing much more in our lives than we can see or know. He is thinking about us forever. There are life lasting benefits that come with trusting God.

The next time you are tempted to hang it all up, think again, and remember the Apostle Paul’s words, “So don’t throw away this confident trust in the Lord.”

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For the Love of It

Our world is filled with practical realities that are important.  Will it pay?  Can you make a living at it?  Will people want what you are offering?  The list goes on.

Every once in a while you run into someone who is doing something from a completely different place – just for the love of it.

There is a “super sweet spot” when someone combines what they love with what they do and it actually provides practical support to everyday needs.  Life doesn’t work this way for everyone, but along the way, we should be looking for those sweet spots of meeting everyday needs with something we love to do.

Here are a few ideas to help you on the way:

  • There is joy to be found in any kind of legitimate work.  You might not see it at first, but look for it.  You might just find an area within the work that you grow to love.
  • Know your strengths.  Take an assessment like “Strength Finders” to better understand connections with your work and passion.  We all perform better when we are doing something we like.
  • Grow to love work.  We are not made to be idle.  Yes, we need rest but we were created to work and to be productive.  Idleness produces discontent and it shuts down our ability to see good in the things around us.  Productivity connects us with creativity.  When we are working, we are more creative and our connection to ourselves and others improves.
  • Connect with God.  He is the source of love.  Ask Him to connect what you do with what you love.
  • Be patient.  A gifted photographer doesn’t make it overnight.  Passion combined with talent needs time to mature.  Develop your passions.  Improve your skills.  Don’t walk away from simple and honest work along the way.

I am thankful for the life God has given me through the ministry of Warm Beach Camp and Conference Center and the broader community of Christian Camping.  My work connects me with God.  I see people choose a better path for their life while at camp.

And don’t forget the campfire.  Just for the love of it…

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Who Has Called?

Therefore I, a prisoner for serving the Lord, beg you to lead a life worthy of your calling, for you have been called by God.  Ephesians 4:1 NLT

The truth is, we all make rapid adjustments based on who is trying to connect with us.  Am I dressed right? How do I need to greet this person? I hope they don’t bring up that conflict from the past.  And the list goes on…

We all have a strong desire to do well with people trying to connect with us.  In a group setting, peer pressure presents responses that, unexamined, can move us in the wrong direction.  Most of us are reluctant to stand out in a group situation.

Many years ago I interviewed for the position I currently serve in as the Executive Director of Warm Beach Camp and Conference Center.  It was a thorough process with a full combination of written responses, consultant evaluation, and a wide variety of group meetings.  I came away from those interviews wanting to do a great job, in part, because of the people God had used to call me.  Their call to me to take this job really mattered.

The Apostle Paul writes to all of us when he says “ Therefore I, as a prisoner for serving the Lord, beg you to lead a life worthy of your calling, for you have been called by God.” Ephesians 4:1 NLT

Imagine God texting you with the following:  “I want to talk to you about your future.  You have some great opportunities and responsibilities I want to give you. Can we meet?”  I know that I would be very excited, and maybe, a bit anxious for that meeting.

The main point is that we should be focused on the one who has called us… God, Himself.  He has called us.  He has made a relationship with Him possible through Jesus Christ.  He has asked us to live in this world in a way that demonstrates His love.  He has given us the Holy Spirit to be able to live out the call.  He doesn’t expect perfection, because He is perfection.  He asks us to come closer to Him,  to align our lives with Him and the work of His Kingdom.

What adjustments will you make today knowing that in the midst of all the other interactions you have, God has called you.  Let’s remember who has called us. Let’s live our life worthy of His call…because…He has called.

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Wisdom or Intrigue…Discerning the Difference

When I was a young leader, I would often mistake intrigue for wisdom. Intrigue wakes up curiosity. Curiosity can be helpful to propel thinking and imagination. Curiosity can spur on exploration and the pursuit of “a better way” or a healthier solution.

Intrigue and curiosity can also create a great amount of trouble.  Intrigue and curiosity unchecked can create momentum that override the due diligence of spiritual discernment, listening to God and seeking good counsel.  Group think can take over sound reasoning of people seeking and pursuing together.

Wisdom welcomes intrigue and curiosity with the real boundaries of knowledge, faith and experience. Wisdom slows intrigue and curiosity down for rigorous evaluation and vetting. Wisdom recognizes that curiosity and intrigue lack staying power.  They always have a need for the next thing.

Wisdom has staying power that is made stronger through faithful endurance. Wisdom is something God gives in unlimited measure to those who ask for it with a resolved focus and commitment to God.  Wisdom sees a way through in a profound and powerful way.  Wisdom rarely makes a big splash, as by its very nature, it is humble, yet incredibly effective.  The power of wisdom comes from the sheer effectiveness that flows from God himself.

Having been down the road of leadership, I now pause when I hear the words “that’s intriguing” in relationship to a real challenge.  Questions of wisdom emerge.  Does this make sense?  Why is this intriguing?  Is the curiosity rooted in fear?  What would have to be considered?  Should this intrigue be given any play time?  How does this idea relate to who God has called us to be and what he has called us to do?

Submit the difficult situations to wisdom.  While intrigue and curiosity may provide a little bit of help, be aware of just how fleeting they are.  Choose wisdom.  Ask God for wisdom.  He gives it generously to those who ask Him with focused resolve.